Sometimes I get it right friends. I forgive and move on. But
sometimes, far too often I’m afraid, my heart gets impatient. Really, right now? This. I don’t have time
for this. All I asked you to do was wait until I finished cleaning up the mess you
made in the bathroom and then...Ah!! And what’s that? When did you step on your
snack and rub it in the carpet? My daughter’s head drops down slightly; she
noticed I wasn’t so quick to forgive today. “Sorry mama, I do marker on baby's seat,” she repeats. I take a deep breath, “It’s okay baby girl, mama can wash it,” I try to assure her. But I
knew she read my heart louder than my words. And sometimes, like today, my heart likes to take tally, to add up all the “wrongs” that happened in my day, and then complain
about them and blame others for them.
But Jesus. He’s different.
He had a heart to forgive before we
even asked, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are
doing.” (Luke 23:34a), he forgave while
he was cleaning up our mess (Luke
23:39-43), and he forgave completely,
“It is finished.” (John 19:30).
Forgive and forget. That’s what we aspire to do as mamas. And it's so hard! I know. Even if we manage to do it successfully on the outside our hearts can be full of ugly.
Paul, a former hater-of-Jesus turned radical believer-in-Jesus, was dramatically changed after encountering God's forgiveness. He gives the advice not to just forgive and forget, but to remember and forgive (Colossians 3:13b). We remember
that our sin, the ugly in our hearts that leads to death, was washed away and
made clean, covering our past, our future, and our forever. Jesus even keeps the
scars of the cross on his wrists to remind us of his forgiveness, because it is important we remember (John 20:25-27; Revelation 5:6). Remember and forgive. So today, with Jesus in view I'm trying to forgive.
“God, forgive me.” I
pray. “My little one apologizes for her
marker mess, but my heart is a bigger mess. Help me to remember your love and
forgiveness through Jesus, to receive it in my life, and to extend it to my children.”
Together let's remember
and forgive, because sometimes it’s just not possible to forgive and forget when our hearts
aren’t ready.
With you,
Cassidy
"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." Colossians 3:13
