The last few years, my first 4 as a mom, have been full of joy. There have been so many fun things to do, experience for the first time, and establish as new traditions. We have taken field trips, spent rainy afternoons at home, tried new foods and tried to woo our little one toward our healthy favorites. We have spent our first years as parents in a special sort of glow.

But things definitely changed when we became parents, especially for me, as the mom. Suddenly, most of my every day was full of child care, in all of its forms. And a lot of my favorite pastimes fell to the wayside, as I made time to take care of another human. I stopped reading as much, scrapbooking, playing guitar, rollerblading, shopping for leisure (ha!), painting, etc. It was too frustrating to get started doing something and then be interrupted and never have time to pick it back up again. I started to resent the pile of scrapbooking supplies that represented my lack of free time.

But seasons definitely do change, don’t they? As we approach my baby’s fourth birthday, I’m amazed at how the landscape of my days and weeks has changed. I recently shared a few posts about self-care and spending more time on myself. One thing I did recently as an exercise in carving out time for myself was to complete a month long makeup challenge (which felt totally luxurious in how unnecessary it was!) I’m getting better at claiming minutes during my day for myself. I even sat down recently and completed a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle! I mean, wow. I couldn’t have imagined doing something like that even two years ago!

As my time begins to feel more free, I’m considering my hobbies again. I’m opening that cabinet that has held my art supplies for so long, and I’m starting new projects that I have never considered before. I took a calligraphy class online with my mom. So fun!

And she’s teaching me to sew. ME! SEWING!!

My mom made almost all of my clothes when I was little. She sewed matching outfits for all of my siblings for all of our photo shoots and family events. She is an amazing seamstress. But I can’t make anything with fabric! It all seems so overwhelming and confusing when I sit down and look at a pattern. Cutting all one direction, measuring, sewing inside out, gathering…it just seems like a lot to absorb, much less gain mastery of! But my mom is awesome and very patient, and she’s been giving me lessons.

How cute is my Mom? Seriously!

We’ve made five summer dresses for Austen. I’m so proud of us! Four of them are very basic, I mean LEVEL BEGINNER, pillowcase style dresses. But I did a whole dress BY MYSELF! And then we did one dress with a pattern. It is so fun and satisfying to make something useful and cute for my daughter to wear!

So here is my DIY of late. I have photographic evidence! See that blue pinstripe? I did it MYSELF!

I think the one thing all of these cute dresses illustrate is this: sometimes in life we end up doing things that we never thought we would do. And it's exciting and confidence-inspiring when something unexpected goes unexpectedly well. So I'm learning to expand my borders and take on hobbies that are maybe more "me" than I ever thought, and I'm hoping that this experience will help me be brave about other "unimaginable" tasks, like tart-making or home decorating or photography.

Are you stepping bravely out into "hard" tasks? Taking on new hobbies? Let me know how you've stepped out of your comfort zone recently in the comments!

Love, 

Courtlandt

My Drugstore Top 10

Hey, ladies! Here’s a fun little change of scenery for you—a makeup post! Lately, I’ve been exploring how and when I can spend time on things that refresh me (and as a mom, that is a LOT harder than it sounds!) One of the ways I’ve been exploring my time flexibility and “me-time”  is by doing a month-long makeup challenge, trying new and different ways to apply products and colors that I usually skip over in my hurry-up-and-get-ready-so-I-can-get-everyone else-ready routine.  I’ll admit, it’s been much as I expected—some days have been easy and fun, and others have been harder (for instance, my daughter had a high fever one day—a makeover wasn’t on my radar). But overall, I’m happy with the daily little something that I am doing just for me, even if it’s only an extra five minutes in the grand scheme of things!

So, since I have been thinking about fun makeup products almost every day this month, I thought I would share some of my drugstore makeup favs! Part of what made this challenge do-able for me was the rule that I had to use what I already owned—no buying new makeup to meet any of the daily challenges. I wanted to learn new skills that I could keep using and not need to spend extra money going forward. So most of what I have is from drugstore brands (or Ulta brand, which is basically drugstore quality/price). 

Let’s get started! Here's my Top 10:

1. Anything Burt’s Bees. I am regularly reaching for the Radiance Day Moisturizer, the Intense Hydration Eye Cream, and the Radiance Facial Cleanser as the mainstays of my skincare routine. (I waited and got all of these on sale, budget-conscious moms!)

2. EcoTools makeup brushes. I mean…guys. These are so good. I have the Fresh and Flawless five piece travel brush set, and I just use those for my everyday applications, rather than saving them for my purse or travel times. They blend all of my products amazingly well. Every time. And you can buy them anywhere…Target, Walmart, pharmacies, Ulta…I just can’t say enough here!

3.  Maybelline FIT Me Shine-Free Foundation Sticks. These apply smoothly and quickly and allow me to spend the bulk of my get-ready time TRYING to perfect the different eyeshadow/eyeliner techniques that I somehow have no natural talent for…here’s looking at you, cat-eye liner. :) 

4. BB Creams/CC Creams. I love these and will love them forever. It’s like old me (no makeup whatsoever) somehow sent wishful notes about sunscreen and skin perfecting and anti-aging and LIGHTWEIGHT coverage to future me (makeup for fun—almost daily), and I discovered the perfect makeup for me. It’s all of those amazing things, but it doesn’t feel heavy (which I cannot tolerate, even for SPF--gasp!). The ones I have pictured here are from Physicians Formula and Ulta brands. Both are awesome. But basically every drugstore brand carries these formulas now.

5. Rimmel London Stay Matte Pressed Powders. They cost like $3 and work like a charm. I consistently repurchase. Enough said!

6. Maybelline Color Tattoo 24 Hr Wear Cream Eyeshadow. I only have this one shade (creamy beige) and it’s pretty close to my natural skin tone, but here’s the magic. It works as an eyeshadow primer, keeping my eye makeup on ALL DAY without creasing or fading or smudging. It’s awesome, and WAY cheaper than those expensive brand eyeshadow primers!

7. Physicians Formula Powder Finish Concealer Stick. They have colorful ones to eliminate redness or dark spots, but I just have a light tone one for my under-eye area. It applies smoothly and gets the job done! Also, for those of you who are looking for a bargain, I happened to see a Walgreens ad for this week, and they are on sale for $3.77! WHAT?!? Check out the Walgreens website!

8. Physicians Formula Shimmer Strips Kohl Kajal Eyeliner (the formula for Brown Eyes). Is it obvious yet that I really like this brand? Haha.

9. Revlon CustomEyes Eyeshadow palette in Naturally Glamorous (020). Love how pigmented these shadows are, and the palette includes all the shades necessary for adding dimension to a neutral everyday eye look, even a nice highlighting shade. It’s getting to be my go-to option, especially if I am doing my makeup in the car (from the passenger side, people!). It’s super portable, conveniently sized, and even includes a tutorial graphic on the back.

10. Model Co. Cosmetics Blush in Peach Bellini (02). It’s highly pigmented, blends nicely, and is a pretty universally flattering shade.

I’ll stop here—I don’t want to put so much information on here that it ceases being helpful. Basically, I wanted to make some products accessible, just in case some of you only have five minutes in CVS and that wall of cosmetics is alluring but too overwhelming. I’m finding a lot of fun playtime in this lately, and I definitely want to share it with other moms! Sometimes the things we do in our spare moments as moms don’t actually reflect self-care any more than our busy moments do—we are tidying up or planning out tomorrow rather than relaxing or taking care of ourselves. I picked a challenge that would actually require me to pamper myself a little everyday, and maybe when the challenge is over, I won’t have to give myself permission to keep it up.

Join me in allowing yourself time for self-care? Even just five minutes/day?

Have any good ideas or ways that you practice self-care as a mom? Leave me a comment! I’m always open to new ideas. :)

<3, Courtlandt

Making Me-Time a Priority

I saw a book lately that I immediately wanted to buy. It was called “The Fringe Hours: Making Time for You” by Jessica Turner. Hours? For me? I immediately chuckled to myself over the idea. But it was so appealing, this idea of Jessica Turner’s. She wants moms to practice self-care and do the things they love, so that they can then feel refreshed and ready to care for their families, but she suggests this: what if moms did this within the context of the already-existent pockets of time in their days?

Now, there are not many extra hours in any mom’s day, if any. Sometimes, there doesn’t feel like there is a spare minute. When my little girl was a newborn, there didn't appear to be a spare second. I remember thinking that my whole 24 hours per day had suddenly been swallowed by this very tiny body that somehow kept me from ANYTHING else, especially sleep! I didn’t know how to pull away and take a shower, how to cook a meal, how to maintain my home, or how to do anything except meet need after tiny baby need during that time. There was no time for myself. There was no time for anything except baby and trying to catch my breath and a few extra winks!

But over time, things changed. I began to predict her sleep better and grab my showers during those windows of time. I began doing chores and cooking meals again, whether my baby loved the idea or not. Life had to move forward, and motherhood wasn’t the only hat I was supposed to be wearing. This is the lesson we moms have to live out—that we all have the same job, that of a Professional Multi-tasker. We are moms, we are wives, we are employees, we are daughters and sisters, we are carpool drivers, we are educators, we are homemakers, we are cooks, etc. 

I am a dedicated mother. But over time, I learned to make time for other responsibilities beyond the baby, time for just about everything that needed my attention, except one thing. There was still no time for me to focus on me. There was no regular time to pick up old hobbies, or relax alone, or leave home and do things I enjoyed by myself. My awesome hubby helped when he could, watching our little one while I caught up on dishes or cooked or went to my prayer group. I knew this was a luxury. We were all busy during that time, especially him.

Don’t we feel kind of guilty as moms when we admit to spending time on ourselves? Don’t we sort of consider it a mark of dedicated motherhood when we spend all available time tending to the kids and run out of spare time for self-maintenance? I think a lot of us have a little bit of a martyr complex when it comes to motherhood, thinking we need to shelve all of our self-care or else we aren’t being good enough moms. I have known a couple of moms who seemed to have it all together from the beginning: everything in their homes was kept tidy and they somehow magically got dressed and did their hair and makeup every day. I just didn’t know how to be that well-balanced mom for a long time, and I felt guilty if I prioritized me-time over my daughter or husband or home. I’m still working on balancing my life, and I probably always will be.

But I’ll admit it. I’m spending time on myself these days. My daughter’s almost four years old now. It’s been a long lesson in the making, but I’ve learned over time that while I may not have a lot of available time to spend by myself, it is possible to do things that refresh me a few minutes at a time. I can read a little something, or even a big something, a few pages at a time. I can paint my toenails. I can do a quick devotional. I can take a tiny catnap while my daughter sleeps. I can cook or bake something really fun (hard to believe for some, but I LOVE cooking!) And I have also learned this: I need this time. I am a better, more fun, more successful mom and wife when I am doing things that feed me, even if I am sneaking it into my days or late nights. It’s really fun to pick up old hobbies. It’s really fun to introduce them to Austen, too.

I’ve picked up an interest in beauty and cosmetics. It’s a funny thing, too, because I was never a makeup person prior to getting married and having a daughter. While we were dating, my husband almost never saw me in makeup unless there was some special occasion. The interest just came to me over time, I guess. Now I’m pretty crazy about it. I love playing with all the different colors and brushes, and the packaging is just so fun. And something about it feels refreshing—spending a couple minutes doing something totally superfluous just for myself somehow makes the day so bright for me.

I’m starting a March makeup challenge. I’m celebrating my own “fringe hours” and allowing myself a few minutes each day this month to get ready. I claim no talent in makeup application—a result of totally avoiding cosmetics for the first 25 years of my life—but I do have an interest, and it’ll be fun to experiment with different styles and see how much I can learn this month. I have a good friend who wants to do it with me, and I’m excited about actually planning me-time in advance.

Do you have any time in your day in which you can cultivate your interests? Are you in a phase of motherhood in which there very few extra minutes in the day? Please be encouraged, Moms. If you are practically swimming in the demands on your time, don’t despair. Seasons change, and perhaps there will be more time soon. If you find five minutes during the day, do a tiny something for yourself. And when you do, celebrate those “fringe hours!” I’ll be here celebrating with you, and maybe I’ll even read that book. :)

<3, Courtlandt

On Being an Everyday Mom

I didn’t want to post this. I haven’t written in a month or so (MUCH longer than I had planned), and it seemed easier to come back with a celebratory “hooray” and some post that justifies my silence lately…something that tells you all of the glorious busyness that has kept me away from my writing this month.

But here’s the truth: I got busy with my normal life. I ironed shirt collars, made PBJs, played outside with my little one, ran errands, did chores, and taught the toddler class at church. We had the flu right after I posted last, and you all know how fun that is. And all the while, my weekly writing somehow got off-track, faltered into writer’s block.

“Why am I not writing?” I finally asked myself this week. And there it was—a hard truth immediately dawned in my heart. It’s not that every moment of every day has been impossibly full of responsibility or fun (because we do have a lot of fun!), and thus I had no time. It was worry that held me back. I didn’t want to confess about the normalcy that filled my days. Don’t we all want to put our best foot forward and highlight the special things? My life this month didn’t feel glamorous. It didn’t feel inspiring. It felt plain. But it’s not.

And here’s the long and short of it: we are everyday moms. I never want to deny the beautiful, daily normalcy of matching socks or cutting onions to the background music of Austen giggling furiously about Curious George. I hope this is what I remember someday when I think about this phase of our lives. I want to remember my little girl playing outside passionately every sunny afternoon in the spring. I want to remember ironing my husband’s work clothes, the kale breakfast smoothie-making, the looooong nights trying to put my toddler to sleep, all of these things in my life that are so normal but are cumulatively shaping me into a better, future me.

I’m writing this because I have a heart to mother well, to be a good wife, to be a writer for all of you fellow moms who need a comforting, relatable voice out here in the internet void; I do not want to show you only the pretty and picturesque parts of my life. I want you to see me as I am: an everyday mom. I am just like you.

We all do special things, go special places, and celebrate special occasions. I want to share those things, also. But I don’t want excitement and novelty (or the lack thereof) to determine when I write. I want to deny comparison all of its power. I want all of us to be real moms together—with all of our milestones and achievements and all of our struggles and laundry piles. There is no need to hide our true selves on social media—denying that we have normal (even boring!) moments somehow diminishes their value in our own minds and allows the comparison game to continue among moms, something that I desperately wish I could eliminate entirely.

To me, the most boring parts of my life as a mom are cherish-worthy, or else they should be. I don’t want to forget them, pretend they aren’t there, and I don’t want to hide them from you. This is my life! It’s amazing, every minute of it. 

Join me in celebrating being an everyday mom?

<3, Courtlandt

When God Gives You a Gift

Our week has been a whirlwind. My sister-in-law came home from India for a short visit, we have a family wedding this weekend, and by some calamity everyone we know has recently been under the weather…we’ve been fighting sniffles and throat scratchiness all week.

Regardless of everyone being a little worse for the wear, it’s been great to have Carli here this week. Austen is making up for lost time as quickly as possible—starting with pelting Carli with confetti eggs that first morning!

In the midst of everything busy and hectic happening this week, Austen did something astonishing. Right in the middle of our crazy, she started READING. 

Reading!!

We’ve talked about letters since she was a tiny babe, those fundamental bits of knowledge that we hoped she would soon commit to memory and keep for always, making them a part of our play, a part of our lives. She was quick to speak as a baby, quick to know those ABCs, quick to love books of any thickness, quick to settle into daily “reading” as a favorite pastime.

All the while, I suspected that she intuitively understood me when I talked about letters and sounds during playtimes and car rides and waiting rooms. I had no idea. Our educational play led us to a moment this week when Austen looked over my shoulder at the alphabet magnets on the refrigerator, letters I was swirling around to form short words. She looked them over casually, sounded each one out easily, announcing the words in front of her with lightning quick smiles: “Foxes! Math. Kids! Lids. Cars. Lips. Win. Me…” 

She read them as interestedly as I formed them quickly, a quick study at a game I did not know that she knew. I held my breath, waiting to see how far we could stretch. “Rug. Pug. The. Good. Not…”

She’s read two sight-word readers since then.

I’m feeling the weight of this unexpected gift, a skill we never dared to expect until I had somehow established a regular daily “school time” and pressed hard for it. It is so beautiful that Austen has discovered words and the sounds that make them, and I’m overwhelmed thinking of the world before her, suddenly ready to take her all the literary places I traveled to as a child. It’s this sudden success that has revitalized me, given me a burst of blessed energy for the task ahead, and I know I will need it. The road ahead—that of curating this collection of words and sounds and encouraging progress and (oh, mercy!) handwriting—will require patience and understanding that already feels beyond my limits.

And, oh, I needed this beautiful gift, this sudden new zeal in my heart for teaching my little. Can I be authentic here, just in this tiny space? Teaching Austen to read felt like an Everest-sized chore ahead of me. I wasn’t feeling pressured by her age; she is only three. But I was thinking about my desire to teach her at home in the future, looking at the preschool curriculum schedules I had already created and never managed to stick with, and looking at the weekly tasks I already struggle to accomplish, and I wondered to myself…How? How does anyone learn to read? How does any parent find the time to prioritize this over tasks that feel more urgent? How does any child with a normal-range attention span sit still and absorb information about letters and sounds and word formation? How does any mother actually teach her child to read?

Isn’t it beautiful when God knows your feeling of panic before you have even fully formed it or have been able to acknowledge to yourself that it exists? I had my expectations full of “real” reading curriculum, scheduled school time, and gorgeous child cooperation, and God met me unexpectedly with a gift during playtime. I wish I could take credit for Austen’s reading. But in a way, I really am glad that I can say that God guided us to this point. He can clearly help us move forward without any of my “help” (i.e. panic).

In the meantime, I am reminded of the parable of the talents in the New Testament:

“For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money. Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them.” (Matthew 25:14-19)

It is so intimidating as a parent to know that God has “entrusted to [us] His property.” Our kids are His, not ours, and we are called to stewardship of those precious souls. As a mom, I try always to be intentional about so many things—caring for my child physically, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, etc—but the more things that I learn and try to incorporate into our daily parenting, the more I realize that we are all operating on grace anyway. It can easily feel like WAY too much to handle, much less accomplish well. I’ve definitely heard myself say, “I’m making this parenting thing up as I go!” to people who have asked questions about the way I parent. Nobody wants to be the lazy servant who buries the master’s property, and I know I certainly don’t, even when I am feeling totally overwhelmed. But God leads me again to this passage, reminding me that He gifts “to each according to His ability.” He has not given me more than I am capable of handling. He hasn’t given you more than you can steward well, if you determine to do so. And sometimes, some beautiful times, He rolls up His sleeves right along with us and a child miraculously learns to read.

Shouldn't we make a commitment to ourselves today to do less panic and more Godly purpose in our parenting?

Yup. This is a reminder to myself, people.

<3, Courtlandt

Love is in the Air!

It’s that time again. It’s the after-the-New-Year-but-before-Valentine’s-Day in-between time that frustrates some people. Most years, it frustrates me. As soon as the Christmas seasonal items go on clearance, the aisles of all the stores fill with “seasonal” Valentine’s Day items and Hallmark cards, prompting consumers to spend money on chocolate, valentine cards, stuffed animals, perfume, or any gift that apparently will say “I love you.” Why do they start selling Valentine's Day paraphernalia so early? Why do I feel so pressured?

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I love the holiday, the happy color scheme, the message of love, the chocolate (HELLO, ladies!), the date night opportunity on Valentine’s Day, any gifts or cards that I receive, and I especially love the yearly reminder to express my feelings of love to my family and friends.

But I’m not about the commercialism surrounding Valentine’s Day. Should we have to spend money to tell someone “I love you”? I don’t think so. Is it okay to? Sure!

For as long as I can remember now, I’ve celebrated a “handmade” Valentine’s Day. I get all the benefits of this special holiday, without allowing myself to be pressured or stressed by the commercial holiday being sold everywhere I look. This allows me to actually enjoy the decorative heart theme of all the stores without needing to participate in all of that buying. Love isn’t a commodity that can be bought or sold, and I don’t want the message of love that I am spreading to look or sound cheap or cliché. 

That said: here’s the sheer glory of it all. I LOVE Valentine’s Day! I start thinking about my Valentines as soon as the New Year’s sparklers burn out. I start really thinking about my loved ones. I start pondering God's unfailing and oh-so-patient love for me. I hand-make every card I send to my friends and family, so I get started early in January, digging through all of the wonderful bits and pieces in my scrapbooking stash to find the perfect papers and ribbons to put together in all sorts of wonderful ways. 

All history and commercialism aside, the modern message of Valentine’s Day is that we truly do love each other so deeply, so truly, and we ought to share that love with our loved ones. This doesn’t have to be romantic love, although I suppose romantic love has cornered the market on Valentine’s Day. But it’s okay and wonderful to express our love for everyone, and this is how I use this special day.

Photo credit: Barclay Stockett, my awesome sister!

Sharing Valentine’s Day with my daughter has been so very fun. When she was a baby, I helped her hand-print valentines with finger paint. The next few years, she used stickers and crayons to graffiti valentines for each family member. This year is no different, although she’s added watercolors, scissors, glue, and sparkle to her repertoire. We have so much fun together! Her cards are wild and free; mine are a little tidier, maybe a little better matching in color and design, a little more planned. But she enjoys the process just as much as I do. And it's something we can do together: bonding time over sparkle, hearts, lace, and watercolors.

What about you? What do you do for Valentine’s Day? Leave us a message below and tell us how you celebrate!

Regardless of whether you make or buy your valentines, I hope that you are able to express the love in your heart for your special loved ones this year (not just on Feb. 14!). I hope that the day is more than just pressure to meet a spouse’s expectations or worry about not gifting enough, but a thoughtful time for you to intentionally speak true words of love, instead.

Do you feel alone this Valentine’s season? Are you without someone with which to share a smile and a warm word? Send me your name and mailing address at dearloveshineon@gmail.com. I’ll share a Valentine with you.

So much <3,
Courtlandt

When Toddler Life Just Isn't Perfect

Let’s be real here. Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs on the planet.

And for a perfectionist like me? It’s impossible. I think God gave me a daughter as a cure for my perfectionism.

It started out so well. She slept well, ate well, communicated well from an early age, was oh-so-charming and beautiful, traveled well, dressed well (HELLO baby clothes designers—you’re a bunch of geniuses!)…everything seemed like it was going in such a good direction with such a good trajectory.

And then? I woke up one day to a toddler. A fully communicative, fully aware of all her surroundings, fully decided on her own path, in-her-own-time-zone toddler. She’s wonderful. She’s brilliant. She does the most boisterous shining I have ever beheld every. single. day. of. her. life. She is charming and zany and creative and fashionable. She marches to her own beat. She loves us, God, and our church, and she’s learning about life at lightning speed. And I love all of that about her.

BUT.

She represents the death of most of my careful plans, punctual arrivals, neat and tidy expectations, and organized house. Everything my perfectionism touches, she touches, too. “Oh, you wanted me to wear that Christmas dress to the party?” her adorable face seems to say with expression, “I think I’ll wear this Elsa tutu instead.” Or, “Oh, you thought it would be nice to have a clean car? I thought I would bring twelve books, cheddar bunnies, three stuffed animals, an extra twirly dress, three mismatched shoes, my harmonica, and 17 markers with us on that short drive.” Or, “Ohhh, a nap? That thing we’ve been doing every day of my life thus far? I think I’m giving it up forever, and we can just plan to be home really early every night for bedtime.” (Obviously, I can change any of these situations, but they represent her heightened sense of independence, and I try to allow her some freedom and grace whenever possible.)

You see? It’s really hard to control everything about my life when someone small in my life fully plans to do the same thing in a different way than I would have liked. I never knew how selfish and impatient I was until I became a mom. And I’m still finding those layers of self-first attitude each day, slaying each dragon as I come to it, 3 ½ years into this mom gig.

I know God has a lot to say about how I live, how I mother, and how my attitude matters:

 “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.” Galatians 5:22-24

“I’m learning, Lord. Punctuality isn’t more important than the work you’ve given me to do. It was just a wet outfit and an extra potty break,” I mumble as we pull into the parking lot, late for church. Again.

“I realize now that I shouldn’t have held that plan so tightly, God,” I whisper when things just don’t work out.

“I see now that you wanted me to prioritize this little soul over that coffee date/holiday plan/dinner plan/fill in the blank here,” I concede, begrudgingly, when I’ve called to cancel again.

And every time I think that I have learned this lesson, that I won’t try and hold my expectations up as the most important thing, this little wonder-girl smilingly takes my hand and shows me another, freer way of living. In so many ways, she knows better than I how to live, how to breathe, how to accomplish what needs to be done without accepting outside pressure, how to live in each moment, how to be true to herself. And I’m going to “get” it soon; I really will. I’m learning.

God knew the spiritual formation that was going to take place in my life as a result of motherhood. He planned it that way. And I am so grateful. With each opportunity I have to take a deep breath, accept a change of plans, love my little one through whatever stage we’re in (ahem, potty training was a biggie!), train and discipline and raise her through any type of day we’re in, and acknowledge God’s grace and guidance in my life, I become a better person. All of my good traits rise to the surface, and all the things that don’t really matter fall to the wayside. I’m finding that being “picture perfect” was never a good measurement of our trajectory or success to begin with.

Just breathe a little easier today, Mamas. We are all on different journeys. If yours includes a toddler, my experience says that things are probably a little bit messier than maybe you’d like, a little less punctual, and a lot less perfect, but there is such potential for deep joy! Just know that God’s growing you through each and every phase, and His work is always perfect. He will finish His perfect work in us in due time. <3

“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9 (ESV)

In this thing right with you,

Courtlandt 

(photo credit to Cory Hill, talented photographer and my newest bro-in-law!)